Please, Do Adjust Your Dial

Okay, who knows what I am referencing? Never mind. It's not important that you recognize it. Intertextuality is my game and is not for everyone. So, on with the show...

We all have at least one a semester – the student that we want to just wring his/her little neck because he/she just can’t seem to get it. Oh, that I could video myself delivering that line so that you could come to grips with my frustration. They make us work even harder because we think perhaps he/she isn't the only one not understanding what we are trying to impart. Maybe we didn’t explain thoroughly. Maybe we should have given more examples, perhaps even, have done the assignment for them. After all, we already know what we mean/want.

Yeah. I’ve about lost it, so good luck understanding what I mean, right now. Sometimes, I wish there was a direct portal through which to channel information, one that had no filters on either end, just pure information. 

Never mind. We’d have heads exploding all over the place.

Anyway, here is my problem child this semester. Wait. Not problem. My staticky channel for which I hope my last email found the appropriate station. We have been emailing back-and-forth for a couple weeks on the same subject: Research Topic Proposal. To protect the student’s identity, the actual texts and authors the student is referencing have been omitted along with said student’s name and dates. All other typos, including my own, remain.

From: Student
I am choosing the play _____ written by _____ for my research topic. The play was written in ancient greek time and was written for the greek people as a tragic story. The play is passionate and has lots of emotions that the characters show. This play would be a good topic for my essay that are related to the play we were assigned to discuss in our discussion post.
I have to interject here; I still have no idea what the student means by that last line.

From: Me
_____, please review the assignment description. _____ is not an appropriate topic for this assignment. Get back to me asap with your proposal.
CB

From: Student
The research project should be on a literary topic selected from the works covered in the anthology for this course, does that mean that the topic should be about the plays/poems that we have discussions about, like _____, _____, or _____?

Okay, I get a little pissy here, but come on already!
From: Me
_____, you obviously know the answer to your own question. Let’s dissect your email, shall we:
"...research project...literary topic selected from...works covered...for this course..."
You can do this, _____.
CB

From: Student
For my research topic I am choosing the play _____ by _____. This play was a dramatic play that was performed mostly at the outside _____ theatre. _____ tells a straightforward story involving an unjust act, the usurpation of _____’s throne by his brother, and _____’s quest to reestablish justice by gaining his power back. Throughout the play the character _____ starts to have similar characteristics as the author. This is a good piece of work that I think would be a good topic to write about discussing the works of the poet _____.
Is this better? Am I supposed to talk about the author or one of his plays?
First, did I forget to mention at this is a creative project, not a research paper? And second, notice that once the names are removed, Student could be referring to any number of texts.

From: Me
_____,
What about "works covered" for this course do you not understand? Although _____ is an author "covered", _____ is not a covered text. If you wish to do works of _____ that are "covered" in the course and include _____ as part of your project, that is one thing. But using _____ as your primary focus is not an option.
CB

From: Student
No I do not understand, could you please give me examples of topics I could choose for my research topic?
See, this is when all I can think is that Student wants me to assign him/her the text and tell him/her exactly what to do with it while I hold his/her hand. No. I will not. And I am not going to budge on that one.

From: Me
_____,
Please review the reading lists for each module. These are the texts you focus on for your project. If you wish to do something on _____, for instance, you must focus mainly on his poetry that is assigned, as we don't cover his drama; however, you can combine his poetry with his drama, as long as the poetry on the reading list is the main focus of your project.
CB

From: Student
Ok then im going to choose to talk about _____ works which are these:
Intentionally left blank here; however, the student obviously copied the assigned reading list including the page numbers and pasted the list into the email.
these are covered. Is this good?

From: Me
_____,
How do you plan to address the texts, and how do you plan to present your research to the class?
CB

From: Student
I plan on talking about the meaning the author tries to explain in each of her poems and then show how her works are connected to each other and how her culture and background relate to them also. Can I do that or are you wanting me to talk about the whole topic the _____?
I have given up.

From: Me
_____,
Please don't forget that this is a research project. Also, how do you plan to present your information to the class?
CB

From: Student
By talking about the author and her works, is that fine
?

Why the hanging question mark? Can I ignore Student from now on? Obviously, he/she is just screwing with me. 
From: Me
Oh, _____, you are a funny guy.
If you look at the Creative Research Project handout you will find, "The project must be able to be circulated. Therefore, please plan to put your work in a format that can be disseminated (i.e., server, website, blog, jpeg, PDF, etc.)," which is how you present the information. So, how do you plan on presenting the information to the class?
CB

Can I have a really big libation now? I’m gonna; 'cause there's no telling what I will find when I open my email in the morning. And to think, I actually like teaching, even when I have to turn my back to the class and beat my head on the board. Oh, that I could beat my head against some of the heads I'm trying to infiltrate. Yeah. No. Penetrate just sounds so very wrong.

Quote for the day: The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. George Bernard Shaw

Comments

  1. Every semester I tell the Art History I students that they can choose any piece of work between the dates the we cover for their research paper: Prehistoric to Gothic AND that their topic must be approved, by me, before they begin writing.

    Every semester, a few ignore me...

    I get papers about Van Gogh,Starry Night, to be specific. I love Van Gogh, but I think, maybe, he is a BIT after Gothic. Slightly. When did I approve this? Oh, yeah, I didn't.

    One semester, a young woman decided to do her "research" about the painting over her grandmother's mantle. She did not know the artist who did it, when it was created, it COULD be Impressionism, but she was not completely sure ... but she assured me that it was art and an appropriate research topic. (That paper, of course, contained absolutely NO research) Really??

    Her argument? She interviewed her Grandmother.

    What I did not say but wanted to: "Unless your grandmother was born in the Gothic period, it still doesn't count."

    What they don't tell you about diplomacy is that it hurts sometimes. You would rather not use it all - and it is painful to have to at times.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I forgot to mention that this is only one of about five different email chains between Student and me. This low number undoubtedly is because they haven't had to turn in much, yet. Oh, the end of the semester is going to be fanfrakkingtastic!

    ReplyDelete

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